Saturday, January 31, 2009

Note..


If my blog isn't updated that much in February, it is because it is a hard month for me. In ten days, I reach my two years of being sick. I am not sure how to feel about this, because it was completely unexpected. I went to bed and couldn't get up the next. My doctors at that point though it was something simple, but it turned out to be complex. So complex that I don't really understand it yet. I only know that it is forever something that I will have to deal with. My family, friends, and books are what has made it bearable and I am thankful for all those things.
Lately, it has also been harder, because in November my doctors found that my first infection is still there. Meaning that I will be on antibiotics for at least six months and they might have to do surgery in order to see what is wrong with the muscle and joint in my hip area, and why it hasn't healed yet.
Honestly, dealing with this... it is like a part of myself has died. The child-like shy girl of ages ago. So here is some random stuff.
Photo to the Right: taken March of 2007, right after I got my drain off. I couldn't shower for 15 days. I learned to love Baby wipes in that time. My hair is also really thin, compared to my normal hair.
Last book read before Sick: Lets Get Lost by Sarra Manning, I try to read it every year though it hurts in a way.
I think that is enough of memory lane for me, before I cry too much. This will also be an explanation of bitchiness, sadness, and other emotions in coming weeks.
Take Care, Sarah.

13 comments:

  1. Oh, Sarah. I'm so sorry it's been so tough for you. And you're more than entitled to any bitchiness and sadness. Surround yourself with the things and people that keep you going as much as possible--that will take you a long way and so will your inner-strength. And it's easy to see that you're definitely a strong person. I have much admiration & respect for you. I'm sending good thoughts/vibes from Canada.

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  2. Take care of yourself, Sarah. I will be thinking of you and cheering you on. You're so brave and strong. A real role model. You go, girl!

    xoxoxoxJustina

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  3. Sarah, my fellow night owl, I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I am sending lots of hugs and good thoughts your way.

    XXOO
    Sarah

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  4. I'll be thinking of you Sarah! *hugs* :)

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  5. Hang in there, Sarah...We're all here for you!
    xoxox

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  6. Sarah, I am so very sorry to hear this. Your strength is amazing and is something that I admire about you. You will be in my thoughts.

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  7. Sarah, I'm really sorry. Hang in there, you're a great person! (: You rock!
    Lots of love,
    Claire

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  8. Hi Sarah,
    Your story was heart-wrenching and inspirational at once. I ran to hug my kids after reading what you wrote. Take heart through and remember that people from around this world are cheering you on and sending you healing thoughts.
    Hugs,
    Deborah

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  9. Oh, God, I'm sorry. One of my friends has cancer right now, and feels sort of the same way you do. You're an incredibly strong person; you'll be in my thoughts!

    Peaches

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  10. I don't know you very well, but I have been recently enjoying your blog. I cannot imagine what you are going through, but I would be frustrated if I was going through what you were going through. You are entitled to how you feel - bitchy, emotional, sad - and we your followers are entitled to cheer you up through the gloom!

    Stay strong! You will be in my thoughts :)

    cecilia

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  11. Hi, Sarah.
    You're so entitled to all those feelings--and you're great as you are so your readers will understand! Good thoughts from NYC!

    xo, Melissa

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  12. I'm so sorry.
    Hope everything turns out alright.

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Thanks for visiting. Every comment creates a smile.

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